Just wondering: Will it take two or three vans to transport what's left of Florida's roster to Texas for the Michigan game? Or perhaps it's just cheaper to Uber.
These things must be considered as the Gators' incredibly shrinking depth chart continues to do the old David Blaine thing. You know, disappear. The state of the Gators has almost become the storyline of opening week even with Florida State and Alabama cracking the seal on the new Mercedes-Benz Stadium.
Just to catch you up: Ten Florida players have been suspended for various violations. Mostly, it's been misuse of school-appropriated funds. Jim McElwain will be missing almost 12 percent of his scholarship players. We'll see how that measures up against Jim Harbaugh, who has lost 77 percent of his starters (17 of 22) from last season.
When this contest was arranged a few years ago, no one expected this burning question the day before the game: Fly or drive, Gators?
Onto the rest of the Week 1 storylines ...
1. Remember the Noles? The nation seems to have forgotten there is another team on the field with Alabama Saturday night in Atlanta. And by nation, I mean the other so-called CBS Sports "experts" who picked Bama to win Armageddon in Atlanta.
All props to colleague Barrett Sallee, the only other CBS Sports scribe to pick Florida State. Barrett lives in Atlanta, knows the city and how it has transformed into the college football capital. Now, we have convince everyone else about FSU.
For all the anticipation over Jalen Hurts in his second season as a starter, FSU's Deondre Francois is experiencing the same thing. Anyone not named Deshaun Watson got overshadowed in the ACC last year. Francois has the arms and legs to challenge a revised version of perhaps Nick Saban's best Alabama defense in 2016.
Don't forget, it's fairly even between these teams' running backs and defensive backfields. Najee Harris vs. Cam Akers? Can't wait. If the nation's best defensive back is not Alabama's Minkah Fitzpatrick, he's Florida State's Derwin James.
There's something that tells me Jimbo Fisher hasn't peaked yet at Florida State. This is going to be a statement game for the ACC, the Seminoles and the Tide. After Saturday, Alabama is going to have to win the rest -- and probably will -- to get back to the playoff.
2. Gator flop? Now that the jokes are out of the way, let's get serious about Florida-Michigan. Yes, the Gators are going to be hurt without receiver Antonio Callaway and tailback Jordan Scarlett. Callaway can be spotty. He can also be impactful. Scarlett (889 yards last season) is Florida's best back. That's the difference for me against a solid Michigan defense.
You know by now that Harbaugh returns only five starters, but one of them is quarterback Wilson Speight. He is not, well, great, but he is experienced. Putting this game on Florida's Feleipe Franks making his first career start without his best receiver and running back isn't fair.
And those suspensions may not be the end of it. I changed my pick in mid-week. Michigan to cover.
3. Hot Seat Bowl: There are enough distractions in Texas A&M-UCLA. Josh Rosen's mouth vs. Kevin Sumlin's job security. Josh Rosen's mouth vs. Jim Mora Jr.'s job security. The Aggies have to win because word is that Sumlin has to win 10 to save his job. The Bruins have to win because the SoCal attention span is about two quarters.
USC is top five. UCLA just spent $75 million on a new football facility. Rosen is fully healed from shoulder surgery. UCLA's outspoken quarterback can't wait to get back after injuring his shoulder halfway through 2016. Texas A&M athletic director Scott Woodward can't wait to start assembling a list of Sumlin replacements if the Aggies lose.
Redshirt freshman quarterback Nick Starkel will reportedly start for the Aggies, which is good. If history holds, Texas A&M will start 5-0. First-time quarterback starters under Sumlin are 5-2.
4. BYU in the Bayou: It's just really, really hard to concentrate on football in BYU-LSU. The incredible irony: The Superdome is being used to save a football game affected by a Hurricane Harvey. A bunch of football games were run out of the Superdome so it could be used to save a city 11 years ago during Hurricane Katrina.
It seems a bit of disrespectful to talk about LSU gaining more of a homefield advantage playing in New Orleans. For BYU, this may be as close to a New Year's Six bowl the Cougars get in their era of independence. The home of the Sugar Bowl will also host a CFP semifinal on Jan. 1.
Somewhere in there, Ed Orgeron starts his first full season as a head coach in 11 years (Ole Miss).
5. It would be the most Tennessee thing ever if the Vols stomped Georgia Tech on Monday night as it treks towards an SEC East Division title. That's because Butch Jones didn't stomp everyone last year on his way to an SEC East Division title.
Jones has to win Monday night to keep them talking football -- rather than job candidates -- in Knoxville. New AD John Currie has Jones' back. It will stay that way unless the bottom drops out, which it shouldn't.
The Vols get the nod here because Bob Shoop has had all offseason to prepare for Paul Johnson's option. That and Georgia Tech's leading rusher, Dedric Mills, has been kicked off the team.
6. Border state showdown: Virginia Tech and West Virginia haven't met since 2005. We'll see how long hate lasts. Back in 2003, when Virginia Tech announced it was leaving for the ACC, it was the beginning of the end -- for the Big East and a bitter rivalry.
Mountaineers everywhere haven't forgotten. Both teams overachieved last year. Virginia Tech got to the ACC title game and to within seven points of eventual national champion Clemson. Both teams have lost their quarterbacks but feel good about their replacements. Former Florida QB Will Grier takes over for Skyler Howard in Morgantown. Redshirt freshman Josh Jackson starts his first career game at a neutral site (FedEx Field).
Those are two reasons to like the Mountaineers: An inexperienced quarterback leading the Hokies who have lost their last seven neutral site regular-season games going back to 2004.
